Weirdforgood Hangout – 7 – The Big Bad Wolf of Self Judgement

The Two Wolves Story begins a fantastic discussion about self judgement in our Hangout this week. It is an empowering feeling to recognize that we are in control of whether we ‘feed’ and give life to our negative thoughts and beliefs, or our positive and life enhancing thoughts… OR, how we can take anything that comes at us, and find the message, and be the change that we want to see in the world.

With Aaron Nichols & Michael Wright

You’ll want to have a notepad handy again this week!

You can read more about me, Aaron Nichols on my about page. (sorry that my video feed is choppy!)

or Michael Wright’s website — http://www.fatherofone.com

Enjoy!

To be part of next week’s Hangout — Email Me at aaron@truenorthffc.com, each week I send out an invitation email with the details on how to get setup. (It’s pretty easy) then join us at 5:30 CST with 45 minutes to get in depth and have a fun — REAL discussion!

Big Bad Wolves Are Eating You Alive, Why Feed Them?

I’m Not Creative. It’s True. My mind is bleak and bland, repetitious and boring, dull and taupe in (lack of) color.

Creativity has never really been my thing. In fact, just this week, I had my very first crack at true imagination. I made something new. It was beautiful. It may have been the very first time ever, in my whole life. I enjoyed it 🙂

Now, if you have known me for a long time, you may be wondering why I say I’m not creative. And if I’m not, then why would I pick things like artistic graphic design, photography, web design and writing, to express myself? Maybe you think, I’m being self deprecating, and you can prove that I’m creative, because you either have one or ten tee shirts in your closet that I have ‘created’ over the years, and you think they look cool? I will admit, I have a knack and have practiced for many years to be able to pick fonts and colors and graphics and use professional programs to make a cool design. Even now, I’m writing to you on a blog that I have custom created myself, including all the graphics, all the photography, all the writing too… But I’m speaking about Creativity, in a much more powerful and profound way.

It turns out, that I haven’t been using my Creativity at all, in a very important area.

My thoughts.

Once again, this week, like a thousand times before, I was in reaction mode. I had a couple things on my mind that were bugging me. I had saw myself as backed into a corner. I felt pressure from the weight and heaviness of the issue. I saw a future unfolding because of this issue that I didn’t like. I was perturbed and annoyed that certain things were in my life, and in the life of those around me, that I felt didn’t match up. I had dug a hole of depression in my brain around this issue, and there I sat. Stuck.

Until I got a great message… Until I was blessed with a step up in conciousness… Until I saw that I wasn’t being Creative at all…

See I had this certain situation in my mind, that had me down. If you want to play along, insert any situation of your own, that brings up emotions like: annoyance, regret, disappointment, sadness or anger.

Then run it through this question: Have I decided that this thing is Bad?

Whoa, take that again, more slowly this time:

Run your situation through this question: Have I decided that this thing is Bad?

Powerfully simple, yet profound. I believe this question was a message from a higher power to help me jumpstart my creativity, in new ways.

I HAD decided that this situation I was thinking about, was Bad. I Did think that relationships were suffering and my options were being limited and I couldn’t be fully me, because I HAD DECIDED that this thing Was BAD.

Wow. Now, I’m going to boldly stand here and intentionally ignite a fuse with some readers. On Purpose. (Because I really don’t think this is BAD)

Politics. Religion. The Economy. These are issues that you may have decided are BAD. How about issues with a spouse, or co-worker, or boss, or children? Have you experienced something and immediately gone into a negative reaction mode? Check with yourself right now, and ask, ‘Did I decide that thing was bad?’

If you are capable of asking yourself this question, Bravo! You have a chance to practice a new form of creativity. It can unlock you from stuck situations. It can free the emotional bondage around a broken relationship. It can grease the rusty and mechanically frozen wheels in your mind, that stopped dead in their tracks, the moment You Decided Something was Bad.

We can see in hindsight, plenty of reasons to disprove this choice and judgement of any situation. Seeing later on, that we avoided more pain, or a new door was opened when the one we wanted closed, gets plenty of praise. But let’s live one step closer, in creativity, to  a place that is more exciting and FUN for our naturally creative minds.

I (in theory, and more easily, with more practice) can take any situation, and stop myself before I decide it’s Bad. Or (if I missed that moment) I can see afterward, while feeling junky, that I’ve made this Choice, and go back and pick something new. It’s all up to me. I can switch things around at any time. I’m in charge. Not the situation, or the other person.

The reason for all this playing around and testing new systems of operation? Because I want to feel good.  Guess how I feel, when I decide something is bad… really… think hard on this one! Yeah, BAD! Guess how I feel if I decide something sucks… Yeah, I feel sucky! Guess how I feel, if I decide something is hard… or difficult, or stressful… (yes, these are all DECISIONS we make, not 100% truths) I feel exhausted, and tired and stressed out!

When I decide something is Good. Well, I feel Good. When I decide something is AWESOME! I feel AWESOME! When I decide something is profound, and deeply moving, I feel an ocean of peace and internal power.

Okay, so time for some creativity! Time to awaken the artist in my mind. Time to use my imagination to make something that I actually WANT, rather than just how it operated when I took it out of the box 33 (almost 34) years ago. I get to use this tool of my mind to DECIDE, how my life is right now, and how each of these little situations unfold throughout my day. It’s all up to ME!

I can see the hope, I can see the challenge, I can see adventure, I can see problem-solving, I can see a puzzle, I can see a game, I can see unmolded clay, I can see something I choose to let go of, at anytime, instead of a BAD PROBLEM, if I so chose.

Of course, not all things are Bad. And that’s why we stay stuck. We see some things as good naturally. So we just expect to keep our eye out for more good situations or people or opportunities to show up. We want to grab ahold of the ones we already see as good, and grip them with an iron fist. We get the feeling that the world has a lack of good things, and we should make the most out of the ones we get.

WRONG!

All situations show up as completely neutral, until we decide a judgement about them: Good or Bad. Don’t believe me? You can test this. Just think of two polar opposite things in your life, one good, one bad. Ask Yourself, When did I decide that this thing was Good? When did I decide this thing was Bad? You will get an answer, because you did the deciding. You already know this truth. Test it.

So, Get Really Creative. Play Artist in your own mind. Repaint the things that don’t make you feel good. And also see that the already good ones, have some flaws too. You need to see that you’ve made this choice  You have the Power. You can OWN your Life. Situations don’t own you. YOU own YOU.

This way, you can begin to flow, in the natural harmonious rhythm of our universe. In our Lord’s Prayer, we ask for our Daily Bread. That is Bread for the Day. Not for a stockpile of cash, and a basement full of ammo and food for the apocalypse. That is living in a chosen state of Fear. That doesn’t leave room for God. Seeing and freeing ourselves to live in a cycle of ebb and flow, is Biblical. It actually feels good. All things come and go. We can enjoy them or Not. We can dance with life, or it can break us. It’s all Our Choice.

What do you chose today? Here’s an idea: Choose Love, for God, for your Neighbor, for Yourself.

Sincerely,

Aaron Nichols

The Story of Two Wolves

 An old Cherokee chief was teaching his grandson about life.

 “A fight is going on inside me,” he told the young boy, “a terrible fight between two wolves.  One is evil, full of anger, sorrow, regret, greed, self-pity and false pride.  The other is good, full of joy, peace, love, humility, kindness and faith.”

“This same fight is going on inside of you, grandson…and inside of every other person on this earth.”

The grandson ponders this for a moment and then asks, “Grandfather, which wolf will win?”

The old man smiled and simply said,

“the one you feed.”

 

Want to talk together about ‘The Big Bad Wolf?’

You’re invited to join the next weirdforgood hangout, and engage in our online workshop – you’ll need a free Google+ account, 45minutes to work with us, at 5:30 CST. You need a device with a camera & headset/microphone. If you can Skype, you can do this, (it’s actually really easy  ) Then email me at aaron@truenorthffc.com – before Tuesday – I’ll send you the hangout invite through Google+ when we start.

Check out last week’s hangout here, to get a feel for it. Join us if you dare!