I’ve got to tell you about a Killer Hangover I had a couple days ago. WOW!
Last week I told you about some mind muck and tough stuff going lately around here, and I’m not going to skip the details, so here you go.
At least 3 times last week, I found myself smack dab in the middle of a hardcore, all out heavy-duty powerlifting workout, and felt every bit of the pain.
1. Recently, Lindsay and I have had the extreme pleasure of working with world-class coach Bobbie Robertson, and her six-gun Texas-style approach to real progress on tough issues. I say it was an an ‘extreme’ pleasure, because vanilla and ho-hum, it ain’t. In fact, we’d been cranking up the heat during our conversations, until last week’s meeting brought us to the boiling point. And boiling is not fun.
We are working on career issues with Bobbie. Let’s just say, it’s a B-I-G D-E-A-L.
So the pot boiled over, and we had a mess. It lasted for days. It was exhausting, it was tough, it pushed us hard.
2. Later on in the week, I had a close brush with insanity during and after a somewhat ‘normal’ evening amongst the guys. Helping my brother-in-law with his camper, and just doing guy stuff wouldn’t bring most people to insanity. However, my already beat-up brain was near meltdown, and after a full evening of just hanging in the shop; I was losing it.
This personal decision to release of one of my old vices (alcohol) has been a rickety roller coaster, yet clinging to it’s steep and winding tracks.
On Friday night, I thought it had come off ’em.
While I was glad to be among friends and family and helping out, my old demons were a dancin’ baby. They wanted to par-tay, crack a couple cold-ones and the inner gun-fire was blasting from both sides. I drove home, passed the liquor store, and soberly exhaled deep over and over, while wondering if all this pain is really worth it.
3. Saturday morning, I arrived to my privilege and duty, at a retreat for the leadership at my Church. I love these meetings, among strong people of faith, people who care deeply for each other, and our place of Worship. This retreat day, a block of time for decision making and progress, again offered a challenge and a workout.
We covered many issues. We all care so much, and out of love, we discussed tough stuff facing many churches today. I, of course, didn’t keep my thoughts to myself, and after a full long morning of real important work, I was drained. I wasn’t the only one. Our whole team of elders, and especially Pastor Tim, care so much, they put their hearts and souls into this place and it’s not always easy.
I relate the feeling afterward, to that of a seriously intense workout.
The aftermath, the exhaustion and effort resulted in a serious hangover.
Yes, a Serious Hangover.
Late Saturday night I thought back over the week. I remembered how close I came to drinkin’ it up. After that moment of escape, after almost 8 dry months, I would have had a big fat head-throbbin’ hangover, the price you pay for a fun night out. (which experienced thousands of times)
So, since I decided to take the other route, what where the ‘consequences’ of these choices? I say ‘these’ because I mean that;
- In event #1. Lindsay and I could skip the hard work of these coaching calls, and just figure stuff out as we go on our own, without professional dynamic help.
- In event #2. I could have had a couple beers, no big whoop, relaxed for a bit, and called it a night, rather than fight my urges and feel like a looney-toon.
- In event #3. I could have passed on the invitation to be a part of our Session at Church. It’s much easier to just go and worship and eat snacks.
- Hangover from hardcore coaching sessions on the career path of the Nichols family:
- Lindsay and I have been into battle together. We’ve learned more about the strength and willingness and desires of each others hearts. I had the chance to deepen my love for her, as we uncovered raw wounds and found mutual understandings. We aren’t ‘fixed’ or ‘out-of-the-woods’, but we have grown and created a solid structure to begin building the foundation of our future together. Thank You Bobbie, for Your Tough Texas Love!
- Hangover from skipping the suds and having one more moment of sobriety:
- I get to know that I can make it through those moments. It is possible, I am capable with the God’s help. More of these moments are to come, I intend to ask for that help without ceasing. This just feels right, for me now.
- Hangover from our powerful retreat and deep sharing of our ideas for the Church:
- At our regularly scheduled meeting on Tuesday, our elders knocked out a bunch of good work. We’re moving forward. We’re making headway, and we had a really good attitude and energy in the room while we did it.
The pains have literally created a bunch of awesome gains! The party in this sense, comes in the serious hangover, the amazing aftermath, and the surprising real results.
In my world last week, I felt the floor coming out from underneath me, the foundation shifting, I was scared as hell.
Apparently I was feeling a relocation to higher ground 🙂
Thanks be to God.